See Paris Hilton Commercial Video

I’m talking about Paris Hilton’s sizzling new hamburger/carwash/soft-porn commercial (see video here, you naughty, naughty meat lovers, you) for Carl’s Jr. fast food chain!

Like Paris has ever eaten a hamburger, much less a Spicy BBQ Burger. Or washed her own car.

This morning, CNN’s Bill Hemmer was joined by Brent Bozell of the Parents Television Council. Now, really, way to make a non-story into a story, Hummer. Invite the elfin-man Brent Bozell on your show to talk about it. Of COURSE he’s going to say it’s soft porn. Bozell thinks that JUDGING AMY is soft porn. (Last season zeroed-in on Amy and Maxine’s sex lives with scenes that included a nearly nude man and other non-martial sexual situations.)

Andy Puzder, CEO of Carl’s Jr: “This isn’t Janet Jackson – there is no nipple in this… There is no nudity, no sex acts – it’s a beautiful model in a swimsuit washing a car.”

Correction, Andy. It’s not a beautiful model in a swimsuit washing a car. It’s PARIS HILTON in a swimsuit washing a car. What’s next for Carl’s Jr.? Nicole Richie dusting off?

Melissa Caldwell of the PTC: “This commercial is basically soft-core porn… The way she moves, the way she puts her finger in her mouth – it’s very suggestive and very titillating.”

Caldwell added, “After I watched it 219 times, GIRRLLLL, I had to take a cold shower.” And then she bit into a hot, juicy, titillating Carl’s Jr. Spicy BBQ Burger.Andy Puzder, CEO of Carl’s Jr: “This isn’t Janet Jackson – there is no nipple in this… There is no nudity, no sex acts – it’s a beautiful model in a swimsuit washing a car.”

Reference: InthePink